Mehendi memories- Part 3

Acknowledgements: A big thank you goes out to Z for her helpful critique for part 3 which tied in a few missing points and made me edit my work on Mute for the first time!

Part 1
Part 2
What is Mehendi [Here you are Keshi :)]
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I stop looking at my mehendi and come out of my childhood memories. This mehendi which hides you in their colours. This mehendi that started our friendship very many years ago. That introduced a toothy 8 year old dashing boy to a 7 year old wise ass that I was.

This bridal mehendi that adorns my arms.

As the bride and groom are asked to take the phere* around the fire, I stand up. I walk slowly like a shy bride but my head is bowed for it is whirling with memories.

"I wrote to you two summers ago", I say in my thoughts. "Do you remember?" ............

---Sometimes I wish I didn't feel the way I did about you. That I could just give my heart to someone else.

Someone closer. Someone who isn't at the border. Someone who didn't answer the call to his patriotism.

Could you not be like Mohan Chacha and serve our country with literacy programs or some women upliftment reforms? Or by improving our water resources or their rural availability?

I wish I could have an affair with someone else while you're away. I tried to but I couldn't stop searching for you in every man. Atleast with an affair I wouldn't miss you.

Or look for you in the fields, the terrace, the chowk, the bazaar.

I wouldn't have to stop eating mithai or halwa or ras malai because everytime I try to I'd remember how much you loved sweets and how you're not with us to share them.
How can I have them when I know you can't and you are so fond of them?

I am not faithful because I want to.

I do not wait for you because I want to.

I am faithful and waiting because that is the only way I can now be. Because I am bound by the way I feel for you.

Why must you work with such dedication? Why can you not take leave and come visit us? Mummy says I must write more comforting thoughts to you but I am not at peace so I have nothing comforting to share with you.

Do you not miss us?

Do you remember how we used to play in my aangan where we first met over my mama's wedding festivities? I like to sit there because I feel us there.

I feel that the four corners of the aangan have bound our childhood in them, p'haps saving them for me to live on while you're away.

Do hurry back for we all miss you so much. Even I do.

Yours,
Me ---

.........The harvest was bad and Mummy had been pale. Very Sick. But we didn't know that. Not then.

I wrote to you two summers ago. Do you remember?

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*phere = Parikrama or Pradakshina or Mangal Fera- The couple circles the sacred fire seven times. This aspect of the ceremony legalizes the marriage according to the Hindu Marriage Act as well custom.Further here

Update: Mehendi Memories Part 4